January 19: When the experts get it completely wrong…

Last week, I got interviewed by an author writing a book about autistic women in relationships.

During the convo, I mentioned that I work with a lot of neurospicy folks, that I’m getting certified for just that, and that I’m AuDHD.

And I’ve never actually told y’all that before.

Yep, I’m autistic.

Cue the record scratch and long-time readers going, “Wait what?!?”

Let’s rewind.

Eighteen years ago, I finally left my abusive husband—for the last time—and started piecing together why life had always felt…off for me.

His mother had once told me he was bipolar—but never told him.

Didn’t get him help. Just let him flail and self-destruct and hurt me in the process.

That haunted me.

What if you knew something was wrong, but didn’t have words for it?

So I went looking. Talked to doctors. Got tested, and they handed me a label: ASPD.

Yup. Antisocial Personality Disorder, or as I’ve called it, Psychopathy Lite™.

Even though I wasn’t violent. Or dangerous. Or anything but… weird, honestly. But I didn’t know enough to question it.

So I tried to “fix myself.”

Rabbit-holed brain plasticity. Taught myself human behavior like I used to train dogs. Practiced being normal.

And it worked.

Kinda. Mostly.

Fast forward to the pandemic.

Brain fog. Focus tanked. Everything difficult again. Got a new test.

Turns out: ADHD, no surprise to me.

Got meds and a brand spanking new psychiatrist to go with them.

She frowned at my old ASPD diagnosis.

“Nope,” she said. “Doesn’t track.”

More testing. No ASPD. More digging. More huh.

Eventually, she asked herself, “Could it be autism?”

And... yeah. It could. I guess it is.

Officially, as of about two weeks ago.

WOW.

That’s a shift in thinking. A change in my self-identity.

Welp, I never really leaned into my villain era, anyway…

Fact is, the “wrong” label helped me build a better life. Made me curious. Motivated. Determined to figure myself out.

And now I get to help other people do the same—without shame. Without assumption. Without trying to “fix” what’s not broken.

Because a diagnosis might explain why…

But it doesn’t tell you how to thrive.

That’s what I do.

I don’t treat your disorder. I don’t coach your label.

I do help you build the weird, wonderful life that actually fits you.

If you're ready for that?

Let’s talk.

Book your free 15-minute Big Ask Consultation right here.

https://my.curiouser.life/15-minutes-big-ask

Rev Heather, aka Nookie, LUQ
https://my.curiouser.life
+1-855-712-5433 (toll-free)

P.S. Ever had a moment where you realized the people who were “supposed” to know better got it completely wrong? I’d love to hear about it.

Hit reply—I’m listening.