November 12: The friendzone’s sleazier cousin…

I’ve talked about the friendzone before, and you probably already know my take:

• When you pretend you want friendship because you actually want more, you say you're in the friendzone.

• When you pretend you want friendship because you actually want less (like, zero interest at all), you put someone in the friendzone.

Neither is awesome.

Today… we’re going deeper. Because someone reminded me of the f*ckzone.

The f*ckzone is what happens when someone pretends to be your friend—they make plans, they share their lives, they ask about your day, your dog, your weird dream from last Tuesday, they show up like an actual friend.

Except they’re not.

They’re just circling like a vulture waiting for a chance to get in your pants.

And when that chance doesn’t materialize?

Poof. They’re gone.

I’ve been f*ckzoned more times through my life than I care to count.

And it has hurt. Every single time. Because I actually meant it when I said we were friends.

And when someone bails because I’m not jumping their bones?

It’s not just rejection—it’s the shitty realization that my value, to them, was conditional.

Conditional on “maybe someday.”

Conditional on me not noticing their creepy little bait-and-switch. Conditional on me tolerating the lie that their friendship was real.

But it wasn’t.

It was a performance.

An audition for a role I didn’t even offer them.

And when they “don’t get the part,” they flip the script:

“You made it weird.”

“You led me on.”

“You’re not as cool as I thought.”

Let’s be clear:

Someone showing up with secret expectations and getting pissed when reality doesn’t comply?

That’s what makes it weird. Not you. Not your no. Not your boundaries.

And I get it—some people are stuck in this pattern. They’ve only ever seen relationships as transactions.

Sex = success.

Friendship = failure.

But maybe…just maybe…You’re not like that.

Maybe you want real friendship and real intimacy—built on trust not bait, built on honesty not expectation, and built on mutual choice not manipulation.

If that’s you—if you’ve found yourself stuck in f*ckzone loops (on either side) and you want better—Let’s talk.

Book a free 15-minute Big Ask consultation with me.

No pressure. No games. Just truth.

https://my.curiouser.life/15-minutes-big-ask

Rev Heather, aka Nookie, LUQ
https://my.curiouser.life
+1-855-712-5433 (toll-free)

P.S. Ever been f*ckzoned? Had someone pretend to be a friend only to ghost the moment it was clear sex wasn’t happening?

Or maybe… you’ve caught yourself almost doing it, and you’re not proud of that?

I wanna hear. Hit reply. Tell me what you’ve seen. What you’ve felt. What you’ve learned.