October 22: You are someone’s worst person. Me, too.
“You’re someone’s worst person they know.”
I saw that online recently. And someone replied, “Cool. That’s their problem.”
I laughed.
Then, I had thoughts.
Because I am someone’s worst person.
In fact, I’d imagine I’m several someones’ worst person.
Sometimes it’s because of what I’ve personally done to them.
Right now, someone is upset with me because I didn’t reach out for a little over a week, after I’d been saying “Good morning” fairly regularly for a month or two.
And obviously, that means I’m not there for them.
But they didn’t reach out, either...
For some people, it’s because other people told them I’m the worst.
Their friends, people they love, or some random internet stranger with a loud voice.
It’s OK.
I’m used to it.
And for some, it’s because I’m part of an organization they feel wronged by, and they believe I have more power than I do to stop things or change things.
And you know what? I’m OK with all of that.
Because I know who I am.
I do my best.
And sometimes I fail people or get it wrong, or... whatever.
I’m also someone’s BEST person.
One someone, specifically.
And he matters.
Last night, a friend told me I was a turning point for his life.
That I shared some experiences with him that changed how he viewed the world, and convinced him that he wanted and deserved to seek joy.
And he is.
People share the little ways I affect them, too. The positive ways.
“This writing came at just the right time.”
“I told everyone you READ me today. In a good way, a way I needed.”
“I know you and I will never see eye-to-eye, but that conversation we had opened my mind to ideas I probably never would have had, and I’m a better person for it.”
And so on.
Did you know that after Dolly Parton passed, there were people online pointing out how racist and performative she was?
She was also someone’s worst person.
Now, I’m not comparing myself to Dolly Parton.
I’m just giving you an example of someone who did a lot of good in the world, who is loved by so many, and who had flaws, hurt people, and to someone, was their worst person.
It’s just part of the human condition, and I’m here for it, in all of its weird, complicated glory.
Here’s the part I want you to sit with, though.
You can’t be someone’s best person if you’re busy trying not to be anyone’s worst.
The sanded-down, safe-for-everyone version of you doesn’t get chosen. It just doesn’t get rejected.
Those are not the same thing.
If you’re ready to stop playing it safe and start figuring out who your best person actually is (and how to become theirs), let’s talk.
Book a free 15-minute Big Ask consultation with me, and we’ll look at what you really want and what’s been getting in the way.
https://my.curiouser.life/15-minutes-big-ask
--
Rev Heather, aka Nookie, LUQ
https://my.curiouser.life
+1-855-712-5433 (toll-free)
P.S. If you stopped trying not to be anyone’s worst person, what’s the first thing you’d do differently? Say what you want? Stop over-explaining? Let someone be disappointed?
Hit reply and tell me.