August 12: I was accused of being a hypocrite.

Someone wrote to me recently and accused me of being a hypocrite. They said something like this:

"You talk about how you changed your entire life yourself, and yet you sell coaching. Why don't you just tell everyone to do it themselves?"

Fair question.

If you've also missed at least 90% of what else I do. I’ll tell you what I told them—and what tuned them into a client.

Do you think I've written thousands of short articles and emails over the past decade, full of love, sex, romance, and kink content, for no reason?

Do you think I've put out over 600 hours of free video for no reason?

Written books?

Started a brand new free learning community, just for the ask?

(Speaking of which: reply "I want to learn" to any email I've sent, or text it to 855-712-5433, and I'll get you in.)

Of course I have a reason.

I absolutely want you to do it for yourself.

Just like I did.

But here's the real question, and I'm not asking it to be snarky. I'm asking so you can sit with the answer:

If you can do it yourself... why haven't you?

For some people, the honest answer is simple.

They need help.

I believe people only change when they want the change.

But wanting isn't the hard part.

The hard part is that the world doesn't hand out gold stars for effort.

Nobody's tracking the small, invisible wins while you're in the middle of trying to become someone new.

Life just keeps going, mostly unaware you're doing the work at all.

That's exactly what makes real change so difficult.

That's one reason I still recommend coaching, or therapy, or honestly both.

A paid person will notice your progress.

They'll give you feedback and credit for the small stuff, the stuff nobody else is tracking.

Your friends aren't going to do that consistently (and you shouldn’t expect them to).

Your dates definitely aren't going to do that.

That's not their job, and it gets frustrating fast when you're actually trying to build better habits for a better life.

I don't think everyone needs a coach forever.

I built my life on doing the work myself.

But knowing how to do something and having the structure to actually do it are two very different things.

If you're somewhere in between those two, and you're not sure whether you need a guide or just a mirror, let's find out together.

Book a free 15-minute Big Ask consult, no pitch, just a real conversation about where you're stuck.

https://my.curiouser.life/15-minutes-big-ask

--
Rev Heather, aka Nookie, LUQ
https://my.curiouser.life
+1-855-712-5433 (toll-free)

P.S. Have you ever changed something on your own, no coach, no therapist, just sheer will? What actually made it stick?

Hit reply, I want to hear it.