February 24: Opinions are NOT like buttholes.

You know what they say about opinions, right?

They’re like buttholes. Everyone has one.

I disagree.

Opinions aren’t like buttholes.

They’re more like pores. Or skin cells. You don’t just have one. You have hundreds. Thousands. Millions.

And that’s fine.

I’m opinionated. In case you haven’t noticed. LOL!

The issue isn’t having opinions.

The issue is knowing when to deploy them instead of barfing them all over someone else’s joy.

Yesterday I saw an engagement post online.

“We’re ENGAGED! It was the most romantic night of my life!”

Cue the internet internet-ing.

Outrage. Dissection. Moral superiority Olympics. Because she’d been widowed three years ago.

And then a man commented:

“If you don’t want other people’s opinions don’t advertise for other people’s opinions.”

Sir.

SIR.

Can you point to the part where she asked?

That’s right.

You can’t.

Because she wasn’t soliciting feedback, she was sharing joy.

“But she posted it online! She had to know what she was going to get!”

Okay.

But what if…stay with me here…what if we didn’t treat public existence as consent to public dissection?

What if we didn’t weaponize our opinions to feel smart, smug, or morally superior?

What if we…

Oh I don’t know…

Gave our opinion when someone actually asked for it?

Wild.

Revolutionary.

Downright scandalous.

Now yes, I do see the irony.

I write to you daily with my opinions.

But here’s the difference:

You signed up.

You can unsubscribe any time.

This is consent-based opinion consumption.

And I invite yours back. Every time.

Not everyone wants that. Not every post is an invitation to cross swords.

And this is where the Golden Rule falls short.

“Treat others how you want to be treated.”

It’s cute. But incomplete.

Because some people (hi, it’s me!) love debate.

Some people love blunt critique.

And some people just want to share their damn engagement photo without being psychoanalyzed by a cockalorum with WiFi.

Enter the Platinum Rule:

“Treat people how they want to be treated.”

Imagine applying that in dating.

Instead of assuming. Instead of projecting. Instead of “well I would want honesty like THIS.”

Imagine asking.

Imagine calibrating.

Imagine realizing that unsolicited opinions are often just poorly disguised criticism and control.

Understanding this one shift will make your relationships exponentially better.

Less defensiveness. Less egoshock. Less accidental harm disguised as “just being honest.”

More consent.

More clarity.

More actual connection.

If you want help applying the Platinum Rule in your dating life without losing your backbone or your voice…

Book a free 15-minute Big Ask consultation.

Let’s make sure your opinions build connection instead of bulldozing it.

https://my.curiouser.life/15-minutes-big-ask

Rev Heather, aka Nookie, LUQ
https://my.curiouser.life
+1-855-712-5433 (toll-free)

P.S. Do you think posting something online automatically invites critique? Or do you think joy should get to exist without negative commentary?

Hit reply. I genuinely want your take.